We like texture

I had to skip on working this afternoon, even though I am in dire straits.

This is because I subscribe, through no fault of my own, to the Vampiric Work Ethic.

During the daylight hours, my brain shrinks to the size of a tangerine, and I am good for no more than fart jokes and a leaky nose when put in front of a computer with the word proccessor running.

But at night! Ah, the night. Its satiny caress turns me into a monstrous typist that can tear through word counts at up to half the normal human rate! Yes, believe.

The difference is enormous. I am focused, the flow of fart jokes stops to a mere trickle, giving way to a veritable flood of work-related information, some of which is actually quite helpful really, when you think about it. And you can. Because it is dark.

The flipside of the coin, is that you constantly seek sustenance. Literally every paragraph has to be sucked out of some poor, unsuspecting burger-pie or cappucino. I sink my gleaming fangs into these delicacies and pump their life-essence to my brain, now swollen with bacon grease and brown sugar, which makes short work of spewing forth the rhetoric that is called for.

We are few, but our numbers are growing.

The other question I would like to address is the way we address our parents. Now, I am in the particularly unfashionable position of still resorting to "Mama" and "Papa", which, basically, is just a touch more favoured than "Mommy" and "Daddy", if at all.

Can I not hereby make an international appeal to respect these terms as well as the Italians do? Silvio Berlusconi does not have a "father". He has a "papa" and of course: "MAAAAMAAAA!". These are always the last words to leave an Italians lips: "Mi Morte! Fettucine! MAAAAMAAA!" (pardon my made-up Italian)

anyway, you get the harshest looks when using these words. It's not that I am stuck in early childhood. Okay, I am. But anyway, there was just never a logical transition from the one to the other. No one ever took me aside and said: "Okay, skipper, we're moving on to grown-up version now". Besides, after knowing someone as one thing your whole life, it's a bit like taking a life-long Christian and saying, "From now on, it's 'Big J'. Jesus is so BC."

Unfortuneately, in this case, I feel I am part of a dying, or at least very unfashionable breed.

Ciao!


I love this post!

I call my mom, 'Mutti'
(German for mom, not mommy (mama) nor mother (mutter).)

I call my dad by his first name though! All my friends think this is extremely strange. I think it's strange that I don't call my mom by her first name! I call all my aunts and uncles by their names, why must my mom be any different. I have started to call her by her first name but she gives me the 'Oh Kirstin!' look.
 kitty  


Hey, my mom is Mama, too. And my dad was Daddy right up until he died. Well, I still think of him that way. But you're right. Itn's not fashionable here, either. Unless you're in the South, in which case it's perfectly fine. Go figure.

Weird, the post I'm drafting right now has a vampire pun as the title.

Hee hee!! I LOVE this part: Literally every paragraph has to be sucked out of some poor, unsuspecting burger-pie or cappucino. I sink my gleaming fangs into these delicacies and pump their life-essence to my brain, now swollen with bacon grease and brown sugar, which makes short work of spewing forth the rhetoric that is called for.

 C  


Presies. Presies. Die eerste deel van jou post is fantasties beskrywend, en baie waar ook in my geval.
 Marissa  


ja, dit is baie unfasionable. maar ek verval ook daarin. gewoonlik nie voor ander mense buite my gesin nie, though.
 arcadia  


..i think its a culture thing..

..you do as you're taught..

..so, it stands to reason, if the last thing your parents taught you was "mama, papa" and you dont go pushing the boundaries, that's who they're gonna be to you till forver..

..try to not care so much what other ppl think. there's something.. safe bout having a "mama" and a "papa".
 AristoNeeks  


Once, in high school, I put up my hand to ask the teacher something, and instead of saying 'Miss, I don't-' I said 'Mommy, I don't-'

That was when I made a conscientious effort to change from Mommy to Mom and Daddy to Dad. Although, I jokingly call my mother Mumsikins or Mama or Mother sometimes.

I don't understand your Vampiric tendencies! So many people have adopted your way of life, but I concentrate best in the day time!
 mike  


Ja, Niel, stem saam met Neko. Jy is definitief nie besig om jou boundries te push nie.
Grap net.
Was mal oor die post.
 gm  


Mike, that is so funny! I also remember someone doing that at school. I think it's quite normal. But I must ask - did the whole class erupt in laughter. Heeeheee.
 kitty  


maybe we all went to the same school - that happened at mine too!

*hilarious*

..so, dont feel bad.. it happens to the best of us..
 AristoNeeks  


Hmmm... Yes they did. Kids are so cruel!
 mike  


Glad that many people share my... condition.

Even though a bunch of people seem to refer to "Mama", etc, it remains hard to avoid sniggers when this comes into the workplace. I once (doing an internship) had to say the following out loud in a newsroom: "Hey mama, can you come pick me up when I finish work."

Ouch. Ouch indeed.
 N  


I'm 26 and I still call my father Daddy
 GeO  


could of fooled me with the italian... (=
night life rules!!! I also do the whole 'vampire thing...'which shuld be obvios since this is 4am...
sorry if these comments are not very meaning full but i'm only half reading, its a bit early for reading (;
i call my parents mammie and pappie :P
 life of being  


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